Dia 16 – Uma musica que faz você chorar (ou quase)

Transatlanticism, do Death Cab for Cutie é uma música que me emociona muito.

Um mês de meme

Total falta de assunto e aí eu vi essa história de um mês de meme aqui e resolvi copiar.

Hoje é o dia 1 - música favorita. Tão difícil, tenho várias favoritas, mas pra escolher uma hoje, escolho Dull Flame of Desire - Björk + Anthony. Linda de doer.

Where he slowly let me drown

Eu era um coração pesado de se carregar. Meu amado estava sobrecarregado. Eu tinha meus braços em volta do pescoço dele, e era muito, muito pesada. Era como se ele tivesse pés de chumbo, dava passos de concreto, mas me levava. Havia um assassino na multidão, ele se arrastava pelos corredores, não fazia nenhum barulho. Eu sabia que ele estava lá. Eu estava em volta dos seus tornozelos, tal qual cimento. Deixei com que tu afundasses lentamente. Mas meu amado nunca me abandonou. 

Se o amor passado não foi uma benção, esse amado que me carrega é um presente. Ainda que muitas vezes meu coração seja tão pesado que ele mal possa carregar, meus pés nunca tocam o chão.

Passamos pelos lugares escuros que havia no caminho, ele não me deixou ter medo. Havia uma cachoeira, a água fria caiu sobre nós, atravessamos. Meus pés nunca tocam o chão. Ele me leva. E não me deixa ter medo, nunca me deixou na mão.

A floresta me dava calafrios, ele me disse para não olhar. Ele enfrentou tudo que havia e eu apenas coloquei meu rosto contra o seu corpo, eu não olhei, eu não quis ver, apenas ouvi e era assustador. Mas passamos, passamos pela floresta, continuamos no caminho, eu não sei onde ele me leva, mas deixo-o me levar.

E agora...

...fico ouvindo essa e essa, sem parar.

Watch me burn

Ele tem raiva. Eu gosto. Eu posso compreender. Eu sei aceitar. É fácil de me identificar. E tudo vem à tona, tudo vem à tona. Eu preciso dar socos nas paredes para machucar as mãos. Eu preciso correr, eu preciso ficar em forma, eu preciso me preparar, porque terei de lutar, terei de lutar.

Eu tenho muita coragem. Eu chuto todos os baldes. Eu não sei fingir. Eu minto que era muito mais fácil sorrir, mas é isso, é apenas mentira e eu não sei mentir quanto às coisas que realmente me importam.

O sol brilha quando tem de brilhar.

I was a heavy heart to carry, my beloved was weighed down
My arms around his neck, my fingers laced to crown
I was a heavy heart to carry, my feet dragged across ground
And he took me to the river where he slowly let me drown

Milhas por hora

Your heart’s on the loose
You rolled them seven’s with nothing lose
And this ain’t no place for the weary kind

You called all your shots
Shooting 8 ball at the corner truck stop
Somehow this don’t feel like home anymore

And this ain’t no place for the weary kind
And this ain’t no place to lose your mind
And this ain’t no place to fall behind
Pick up your crazy heart and give it one more try

Your body aches…
Playing your guitar and sweating out the hate
The days and the nights all feel the same

Whiskey has been a thorn in your side
and it doesn’t forget
the highway that calls for your heart inside

And this ain’t no place for the weary kind
And this ain’t no place to lose your mind
And this ain’t no place to fall behind
Pick up your crazy heart and give it one more try

Your lovers warm kiss…
It’s too damn far from your fingertips
You are the man that ruined her world

Your heart’s on the loose
You rolled them seven’s with nothing to lose
And this ain’t no place for the weary kind

E então toca algo que me toca...

It doesn’t matter where you’ve been – how far
It doesn’t matter how run down you are
Or if there’s nothing perfect left in your heart
No, it all means nothing, it all means nothing, it all means nothing at all, at all

I’ve told you every selfish lie I know
I’ve taken falls from dizzy heights - I’ve let go
But there is a simple truth to find below
Where it all means nothing, it all means nothing, it all means nothing at all, at all

I’m on the edge for you
Losing my head for you
I’m in the red for you
Tonigh, tonight
Until my hopes fall through
There’s nothing else I can do
I’m in the red for you
Tonight, tonight
I’m on a rescue

Love is a thousand shades of grey – and we know
There’s not a safe or certain way to go
But when we’ve seen all, uneasiness and hate, it will show
That it all means nothing, it all means nothing, it all means nothing at all, at all

I’m on the edge for you
Losing my head for you
I’m in the red for you
Tonigh, tonight
Until my hopes fall through
There’s nothing else I can do
I’m in the red for you
Tonight, tonight

Until my hopes fall through
There’s nothing else I can do I’m in the red for you
Tonight
I’m on a rescue....

Porque não passaria disso.

Ou, sei lá. Também.
Focalize nos fatos.
E o fato é que isso pode acontecer porque eu realmente não acho nada demais. Talvez outras pessoas achassem big deal, ficassem com raiva, essas mulherzices todas que eu ainda não compreendo na totalidade. Free will, people. Free will. O que importa mesmo é franqueza. Lealdade.
Porque ele canta:

Need not to reach for the stars,
when life becomes so dark
and when the wind
does flow against the grain
you must follow your heart

E eu acho isso: siga seu coração. Brabo é essa esperançazinha idiota. Brabo é o reforço negativo. Sim, eu preciso, mesmo que não precise. Porque não adianta me dizerem isso, ou aquilo. Não fazem 15 anos que deixei de ser criança e a modernidade chegou, implacável. Só que ela ainda não é à prova de vento, que piada.
Será que eu saberia dizer quem eu sou? Formalmente, materialmente e analiticamente? Tu saberias?
E dê-lhe Rolling Stones. Gimme shelter, will you?
De novo: atenha-se aos fatos. Eu não tenho do que reclamar. Tu tens?
Acabou o papel para escrever cartas. Não sei quando vou ter tempo de comprar. Ficaremos neste hiato, tudo bem?

Música linda de tudo

She says "wake up, it's no use pretending"
I'll keep stealing, breathing her.
Birds are leaving over autumn's ending
One of us will die inside these arms
Eyes wide open, naked as we came
One will spread our ashes 'round the yard

She says "If I leave before you, darling
Don't you waste me in the ground"
I lay smiling like our sleeping children
One of us will die inside these arms
Eyes wide open, naked as we came
One will spread our ashes round the yard

My Tiny Vessels

Essa música me diz muito...

"Transatlanticism"

The Atlantic was born today and I'll tell you how...
The clouds above opened up and let it out.

I was standing on the surface of a perforated sphere
When the water filled every hole.
And thousands upon thousands made an ocean,
Making islands where no island should go.
Oh no.

Those people were overjoyed; they took to their boats.
I thought it less like a lake and more like a moat.
The rhythm of my footsteps crossing flatlands to your door have been silenced forever more.
The distance is quite simply much too far for me to row
It seems farther than ever before
Oh no.

I need you so much closer [x8]

[instrumental break]

I need you so much closer [x4]
So come on, come on [x4]

Amor mudérrrrno

To be lost in the forest
To be cut adrift
You've been trying to reach me
You bought me a book
To be lost in the forest
To be cut adrift
I've been paid
I've been paid

Don't get offended
If I seem absent minded
Just keep telling me facts
And keep making me smile
Don't get offended
If I seem absent minded
I get tongue-tied
Baby, you've got to be more discerning
I've never known what's good for me
Baby, you've got to be more demanding
I will be yours

I'll pay for you anytime

You told me you wanted to eat up my sadness
Well jump on, enjoy, you can gorge away
You told me you wanted to eat up my sadness
Jump right
Baby, you've got to be more discerning
I've never known what's good for me
Baby, you've got to be more demanding
Jump left

What are you holding out for?
What's always in the way?
Why so damn absent-minded?
Why so scared of romance?

This modern love breaks me
This modern love wastes me

Do you wanna come over and kill some time?
Tell me facts, tell me facts, tell me facts
Tell me facts
Throw your arms around me

Eyes on fire

Será que a raiva vai passar sozinha? Que ódio de gente grossa/estúpida. Essa é pro idiota que me mandou sms no celular me 'pateando'.

I'll seek you out
Flay you alive
One more word and you won't survive
And I'm not scared
Of your stolen power
I see right through you any hour

I won't soothe your pain
I won't ease your strain
You'll be waiting in vain
I got nothing for you to gain

I'm taking it slow
Feeding my flame
Shuffling the cards of your game
And just in time
In the right place
Suddenly I will play my ace

Eyes on fire
Your spine is ablaze
Felling any foe with my gaze
And just in time
In the right place
Steadily emerging with grace

Sutilmente

Ouvi ontem na rádio e gostei muito. Há muito tempo eu não gostava de nenhuma música brasileira. Eu detesto Nando Reis, mas ele é um bom letrista.

E quando eu estiver triste
Simplesmente me abrace
Quando eu estiver louco
Subitamente se afaste
Quando eu estiver fogo
Suavemente se encaixe

E quando eu estiver triste
Simplesmente me abrace
E quando eu estiver louco
Subitamente se afaste
E quando eu estiver bobo
Sutilmente disfarce

Mas quando eu estiver morto
Suplico que não me mate, não
Dentro de ti, dentro de ti

Mesmo que o mundo acabe, enfim
Dentro de tudo que cabe em ti

E quando eu estiver triste
Simplesmente me abrace
Quando eu estiver louco
Subitamente se afaste
Quando eu estiver fogo
Suavemente se encaixe

E quando eu estiver triste
Simplesmente me abrace
E quando eu estiver louco
Subitamente se afaste
E quando eu estiver bobo
Sutilmente disfarce

Mas quando eu estiver morto
Suplico que não me mate, não
Dentro de ti, dentro de ti

Mesmo que o mundo acabe, enfim
Dentro de tudo que cabe em ti

Limon y Sal

Descobri Julieta Venegas e estou in love.
Yo te quiero con limon y sal, hasta que a veces no me gusta tu forma de ser.
Yo te quiero tal y como estas, no hace falta cambiarte nada.
Até porque eu ainda não te conheço tanto.
Ai, a idiotice que assola meu ser. Enfim, vale a pena ouvir.
Mas eu acho que ele sabe.
Não sei porque inventei de tirar as cartas para mim mesma, só pra me anuviar a mente... uma morte, bem ao meu lado. Coisas estranhas, viagem com rato e pássaros. Bom e mau. Não sei se a que foi, ou a que será. E de resto, tudo complicado. Só gostei de estarmos na mesma linha. Só gostei de saber que receberei notícias. Ainda demora? Será? Parece que sim. Tudo bem. O inverno precisa passar para eu poder usar minha camiseta vermelha, com o Mickey e a Minie, pra ir te encontrar.
Beberei vinho e olharei pro rio da Prata e pensarei em nada, nada.

Dieta desintoxicante

I don't wanna be the girl who laughs the loudest
Or the girl who never wants to be alone
I don't wanna be that call at four o'clock in the mornin'
'Cause I'm the only one you know in the world that won't be home

Ah, the sun is blindin'
I stayed up again
Oh, I am findin'
That's not the way I want my story to end

I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're my protection
But how do I feel this good sober?

I don't wanna be the girl that has to fill the silence
The quiet scares me 'cause it screams the truth
Please don't tell me that we had that conversation
'Cause I won't remember, save your breath
'Cause what's the use?

Ah, the night is callin'
And it whispers to me softly, "Come and play"
But I, I am fallin'
And if I let myself go I'm the only one to blame

I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're like perfection
But how do I feel this good sober?

Comin' down, comin' down, comin' down
Spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round
I'm lookin' for myself, sober

Comin' down, comin' down, comin' down
Spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round, spinnin' 'round
Lookin' for myself, sober

When it's good, then it's good, it's so good 'til it goes bad
'Til you're trying to find the you that you once had
I have heard myself cry 'never again'
Broken down in agony, just tryin' find a friend, oh, oh

I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're like perfection
But how do I feel this good sober?

I'm safe up high, nothing can touch me
But why do I feel this party's over?
No pain inside, you're like perfection
But how do I feel this good sober

A Long december

2008 foi, realmente, um longo dezembro. Parece estar acabando agora, que meu aniversário tá iminente. E, cuidado com o você deseja, porque pode se realizar... não disse que queria fugir no meu aniversário? Pois parece que a fuga se apresentou, de uma maneira muito bizarra. But that's life, isn't it?

A long december and theres reason to believe
Maybe this year will be better than the last
I cant remember the last thing that you said as you were leaven
Now the days go by so fast
And its one more day up in the canyons
And its one more night in hollywood
If you think that I could be forgiven...i wish you would
The smell of hospitals in winter
And the feeling that its all a lot of oysters, but no pearls
All at once you look across a crowded room
To see the way that light attaches to a girl
And its one more day up in the canyons
And its one more night in hollywood
If you think you might come to california...i think you should
Drove up to hillside manor sometime after two a.m.
And talked a little while about the year
I guess the winter makes you laugh a little slower,
Makes you talk a little lower about the things you could not show her
And its been a long december and theres reason to believe
Maybe this year will be better than the last
I cant remember all the times I tried to tell my myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass
And its one more day up in the canyon
And its one more night in hollywood
Its been so long since Ive seen the ocean...i guess I should

Til Kingdom Comes

Findi tudo de bom em Itapuã. A natureza é puro amor.
Steal my heart and hold my tongue.
I feel my time, my time has come.
Let me in, unlock the door.
I've never felt this way before.

The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummer begins to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know which way I've come.

Hold my head inside your hands,
I need someone who understands.
I need someone, someone who hears,
For you, I've waited all these years.

For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come. Until my day, my day is done. And say you'll come, and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.

In your tears and in your blood,
In your fire and in your flood,
I hear you laugh, I heard you sing,
"I wouldn't change a single thing."

The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummers begin to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going, I don't know what I've become.

For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come,
Until my days, my days are done.
Say you'll come and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.

O inferno são os outros

Ontem deve ter sido o primeiro dia do meu inferno astral, a própria quarta-feira 13, com direito a jasons, chuckys, etc.

Já começou de manhã: vizinho na trilha sonora romântica. Depois, ele sai a me seguir pela rua, escondendo-se atrás dos orelhões e fingindo entrar em botecos.

Vontade que me deu de ir até ele e acertar um soco bem dado no meio da cara!

Trabalho, aquela coisa. Melhor nem comentar.

Justiça à tarde, cheio de gente, filas, uma bagunça total e não, não estou falando do fórum.

Chuva bem na hora de ir para o boxe. Falta de luz em metade da cidade, desço da lotação e um pivete tenta me assaltar, me atiro na frente dos carros e corro até o clube.

Ao menos a luz voltou bem na hora do treino e pude dar uns bons socos.

Na volta, me dei conta que tinha esquecido a sombrinha na lotação... banho de chuva bem tomado. Ao menos eu tinha música nos ouvidos.

Terminei de ler Cleo e Daniel, e algumas coisas mudaram sim nesses 15 anos de diferença entre uma leitura e outra, mas isso vale outro post.

No mais, ansiosa por algumas coisas. Mas o I-Ching me disse ontem: paz. Assim, fiquei feliz de novo.

Paz. Tudo que eu sempre quis. Paz.

Hoje, só Radiohead salva. Aliás, só bodysnatchers salva. Porque nós vivemos num mundo cheio deles.

Queens of the Stone Age

Fomos rainhas, fomos reis. Hoje? Pó. Mas ainda podemos ser... polvo de estrellas.
Come and sleep with me.

She said "i'll throw myself away,
They're just photos after all"
I can't make you hang around.
I can't wash you off my skin.
Outside the frame, is what we're leaving out
You won't remember anyway
I can go with the flow
Don't say it doesn't matter (with the flow) matter anymore
I can go with the flow (I can go)
Do you believe it in your head?
It's so safe to play along
Little soldiers in a row
Falling in and out of love
Something sweet to throw away.
I want something good to die for
To make it beautiful to live.
I want a new mistake, lose is more than hesitate.
Do you believe it in your head?
I can go with the flow
Don't say it doesn't matter (with the flow) matter anymore
I can go with the flow (I can go)
Do you believe it in your head? X3

but we need pills to sleep at night

I hope my smile can distract you
I hope my fists can fight for two
So it never has to show
And you’ll never know

I hope my love can blind you
I hope my arms can bind you
So you’ll never have to see
What we’ve grown to be

One may think we’re alright
But we need pills to sleep at night
We need lies to make it through the day
We’re not okay

One may think we're alright
But we need pills to sleep at night
We need lies to make it through the day
We're not okay

One may think we’re doing fine
But if I had to lay it on the line
We’re losing ground with every passing day
We’re not okay

But that’s one thing I would never
One thing I would never
One thing I would never say to you
That’s one thing I would never
One thing I would never
That's one thing I would never say to you